Saturday, January 30, 2010

babaylan from down under, Merlinda Bobis

listen to Marie Therese Sulit explore this theme at the Babaylan conference~

Friday, January 29, 2010

thank you, howard zinn.

i'm teary eyed as i listen to Amy Goodman's tribute to Howard Zinn. my thoughts take me to this question: how have i honored the Filipino intellectual geniuses who have liberated me from colonial consciousness and made me proud to be who i am? how have i grieved for the ones who did not write books but whose lives should have been part of my archive of oral history...and aren't because my schooling didn't include them? how do i try to recuperate these losses now that i no longer have as much time left to do so?

on facebook, friends were citing jim zwick, daniel schirmer as among the likes of zinn -- historians of US imperialism. i owe them a great debt, too. plus glorial anzaldua, paulo freire, audre lorde...

i'm also thinking of the intellectuals that i have felt privileged to know in person - ver enriquez, nvm gonzales, helen toribio --whose work is all the more precious to me because of this personal connection. and because this connection extends beyond time, i still feel the power of their presence not only through the pages they left for me to read but the imprint of their physical presence. in moments like this, i still hear their voice, i see the glint in their eyes, i feel the lightness of their being. and they make my tears flow. tears both sad and not. tears of gratitude. perhaps they are speaking now and i need to hear.

what is their question?

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Lama Choyin Rangdrol and Jean will be discuss Babaylan and Buddhism at the conference!!

I will be posting briefs about conference offerings from hereon. stay tuned.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

sigh. what to do?
so many folks out of work.
one barista opening at Peet's and 500 applicants
many with college degrees.

we are undergoing a deep restructuring
you wouldn't know it by the way the pundits
carry on. keeps beating the dead horse
as if it could resurrected

not even bringing a genius back to the
white house staff will carry the populist
message across to an increasingly angry
and confused populace.

and i keep telling myself that i should write
editorials and send them to the local paper
or send them to journals. or post them on FB
and listserves.

i have something to say.

but i was given only one small task
and this is where the energy is
the babaylan conference
coming soon.

the path of the buwaya unfolding...

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

What color is the sacred?

wild animal inside your body
during the day they live inside you
at night you live inside them
such is color (61)

how do you get it, how do you sneak past the watchful eye of the system that in categorizing holds you apart from reality? (65)

not having access to shamans, drugs or spirits, Sartre is forced back onto his own resources - which is his thinking about thinking - a way of using words to tell a story - that will do an end-run around language so there can be some first contact with reality.

the philosopher attains a curious state of freedom from the world by being attuned to it.
music+nausea=story (68)

(Malinowski's) white is the chromophobia extremity that ingenuity masters to box in the extremity of color. white sterilizes the extremity of color (81)

standard shamanic speak - dying so as to transform in a spectral being (86)

body prone to mystical sensitivity to that other body, the body of the world (88)

Friday, January 08, 2010

the largeness of vision is sometimes constricted
by the smallness of resources: money, time, bodies

how then to adjust? do i adjust the vision to fit the small?
or is the vision really for the long term and not just one

i do not own the vision. i'm merely riding on the wave
of energy of my ancestors who wanted nothing more
than the creation of Beauty. Beauty that makes life bearable.
Beauty that comes from their cosmic consciousness.
Beauty that is not bound by theologies and ideologies.
Beauty that liberates.

the small says: you can't create without money.

on the other hand, there are those who say: just think positive.

i am thinking of Barbara Ehrenreich's book on the cult
of positive thinking in this country and she writes that
this thinking is what failed the economy (and no need for me to
go there here).

positive thinking, to me, is different from the pursuit of a dream that
is well informed by historical and political contexts and how
dominant narratives from such contexts affect people at different times and places.
dreaming requires courage and perseverance
dreaming asks for understanding of the specificity of our circumstances
as historical subjects.
dreaming asks that we undo this history but it can't be done with mere
positive thinking.

oh no. the task is more laborious than this. it is painful even.
but if we ride this dream, it will take us to places we hadn't imagined we could be.

dream with me?

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Happy Tandang Sora Day.
She was 84 when the revolution broke out and she joined the ranks of Bonifacio.
Lived to 107.

I remember you.

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